Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
I just saw a hot homeless man
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize
