I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
Randomize
