Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
i need to put some appletini on your dick
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
