Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
