And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
