He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
