We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
