Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
