if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
