Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I wish i was in the wii world.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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