I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
