dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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