it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
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