he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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