nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
