"it" just moved
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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