My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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