You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
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