i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize