areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
i think im in europe. pls send help
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Randomize
