so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
