We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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