How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize