Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
an off duty cop drove behind me last night to make sure i didnt get a dui. i was blacked out drunk and on a pill of ecstacy. he knew this. i must be really pretty.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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