She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
he puts the penis in happiness.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize
