Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize