Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
