I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
