I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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