Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize