Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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