So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
