I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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