direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Randomize