i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize