talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
