Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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