You're my little dorito
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
