I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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