It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I have 39 hot sauces from Chipotle
It's like earning obesity badges
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize