he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
This is why you don't make out with cougars at a bar... I got a linkedin request from her, wtf?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
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