We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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