if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
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