is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
