whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Randomize
