You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
