guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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