Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
