I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
