fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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