she looked like the bat from fern gully.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
We smell like vodka and hangover
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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